Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Part of the Plan

i consider my faith to be pretty strong.
i've gone through some tough times in my life and have come out still believing that there's a reason for everything.
my mind will never be able to completely understand this life. and i'm okay with that.
most days...
but there are times that i still wonder "why?".
this weekend was one of those times.

a dear friend of mine passed away very unexpectedly.
he was a good man.
he was my very first boss. a great boss.
he was also, the one who helped me to start my career.
he was a father, a husband, a son, a brother, a friend, and a true man of God.

i have very fond memories of working for him.
and of just being a friend of his.

when i heard of his passing i thought to myself, "why? why do the good ones go so soon?" "why did his poor girls have to lose their daddy a week before father's day?" "why him? why now?" "surely this can't be right."

i wasn't necessarily angry, rather, just confused.

the next morning was Sunday. and i just happened to be back home and able to attend church service with my old congregation.

a good friend of mine, gave the "prayer of praise". i heard his voice crack as he spoke of bruce and praised God for allowing us to know him.

during worship we sang one of my favorite songs called "thomas' song". below are the lyrics:

Jesus, You were all to me,
Why did You die on Calvary?
O Lamb of God I fail to see
How this could be part of the plan.
They say that You're alive again,
But I saw death and ev'ry sin
Reach out to claim their darkest win.
How could this be part of the plan?
If I could only hold your hand,
And touch the scars
Where nails were driven.
I would need to feel Your side
Where holy flesh by spear was riven
Then I'd believe, only then I'd believe
Your cruel death was part of the heavenly plan.
Holy presence, holy face;
A vision filling time and space.
Your nearness makes my spirit race.
Could this be part of the plan.
I see the wounds that caused the cry,
From heaven, ocean, earth, and sky;
Where people watched their Savior die.
Could this be part of the plan?
Reaching out to hold Your hand,
And touch the scars where nails were driven;
Coming near I feel Your side
Where holy flesh by spear was riven.
Now I believe. Jesus, now I believe.
Your cruel death was part of a heavenly plan.
I proudly say with blazon cry.
"You are my Lord and my God."
as the hymn came to a close i brushed the tears from my eyes.
i realized then that although i don't understand now, someday, somehow, i will.
and because of  "the plan" my dear friend was able to go on from this life to rest with our savior.  
although our hearts ache for him here on earth, we can find comfort in knowing that he is safe in our father's arms.
he is able to see the hands that were pierced for him and the rest of us.
he is able look upon Jesus' face.
he can see "the plan" in full.

he is home now.
we will miss you dearly, bruce.
but, i know we'll see you soon, because it's all apart of the plan.